The Glenwood Collection

In the year 1997 21^st Century Super-Hacker Piggy Stern created a computer consciousness called DARTANIAN. DARTANIAN was coded to display a low form of para-savant intelligence and would represent the pinnacle of Piggy Stern’s career. The intricate and revolutionary programming allowed DARTANIAN to perform only one function: Create MS Paint pictures at the artistic and conceptual level of a child and leave them in a newly created desktop folder called “The Glenwood Collection”.

While attending a seized property auction Funny Blood contributor Fred Pecker saw an item that struck him as particularly valuable: A Compaq Presario with hieroglyphics drawn all over it in gold permanent marker. Fred immediately purchased the item, and upon powering it up discovered a lone folder: The Glenwood Collection. The folder contained a notepad document, which served as Piggy Stern’s personal diary, and hundreds of MS Paint files created by DARTANIAN.

After an impassioned and ignorant debate the Funny Blood Committee on Ethics voted unanimously to open Piggy Stern’s personal diary. We haven’t really read it yet since it’s kind of long, but we’ll probably get to it someday. From what we can figure out by skimming it really fast Piggy Stern was driven mad by DARTANIAN’s art and committed suicide.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I would like to introduce:

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